Get Your Head Out of the Gutter

A 26-year-old man with his head literally in the gutter was arrested on June 6 in Higashi Nada, Hyōgo Prefecture for meiwaku, or being a public nuisance.

The suspect allegedly crawled into a roadside gutter, measuring fifty centimeters deep and thirty centimeters wide, with the intent of peeping up through the holes in a grate to catch glimpses up women's skirts as they passed over.

At 10:10 in the morning, a woman sensing that someone was in the gutter informed a security guard.

The man later admitted his guilt to police, confessing that he had been hiding in the gutter since 8 in the morning.

And the Japanese wonder why their population is decreasing. Let me tell you, if these guys put as much effort into getting laid as they do in trying to sneak a peak at girls' panties, the population would be two hundred million and rising.

In a related story, a man was arrested a few days ago for attempting to take a photo up the skirt of a junior high school girl while she was shopping at a Tsutaya DVD/CD rental shop. The man was arrested on the spot by the girl's father, who happened to be an off-duty policeman. (Oops!)

Beware of Uncle Pervie

Every few days we get an email from the local elementary school reporting a "fushin-na jinbutsu" (不審な人物, suspicious person).

My first thought when reading these mails is usually "Geez, I hope someone isn't reporting me." Because of my running routine--I run like a burglar through about four different school districts dressed in BRIGHT pylon orange almost every morning--and the fact that I am a "guyjin", I stand out. There are often reports of my being seen running here or there.

The second thought is often "Geez, these perverts have not improved upon their game one iota in the four decades since I was a kid.”

Just the other day, a "young man" walked up to an elementary school girl and said, "Your father's been in an accident. Come with me and I'll take you to the hospital."

Oldest trick in the Perv Book!

The girl had the good sense to ask the man what her father's name was. When he couldn't answer, she ran away.

Today, a boy was approached by someone who promised to give him "something nice" if he came with him.

Second oldest trick!

Fortunately, this young boy also had the good sense to high-tail it.